Monday, April 04, 2011

Love Languages

I love this kid and his sweet little face.  

I count myself lucky to have him as my child.  Yes, there are times I wonder why he is so fussy or stubborn, but he is mine and he makes me want to be a better mother.  The past few days have been beautiful outside and we took advantage of it and spent some time working in the yard.  He helped me dig the grass out of the flower bed directly across from breakfast nook. It makes me crazy to look out at the flower bed and see only weeds knowing somewhere in there are tulips. Then he helped me clean up the fluffy mess left in the grass by the voles. He worked really hard and I was feeling blessed to have him by my side.  

On Thursday before heading outside again we had an afternoon snack with his sister and while we were sitting at the breakfast table I asked him what he likes best: 

When someone does something nice for him, like make his bed or find his shoes?
OR
When someone gives him a compliment?
OR
Or when someone spends time with him?

His answer totally surprised me because it was none of those things.  He said, I like it when people give me presents.  

HOLD YOUR HORSES! LIGHTBULB MOMENT!

His love language is GIFTS?!

What? All I had to do was ask? So I tried an experiment the next day.  I told him I had a present for him and gave him a piece of gum.  He was so excited and better behaved all day.  I started to think things over and realized that the $1 nerf gun from the thrift store was just as great as the custom monkey from Build-A-Bear.  It's not the cost but the frequency.  SO having said that, my goal is to make sure I give him some small gift as often as possible.  When he feels loved, he is more likely to want to spend time with me and help around the house and yard.  He wants to be around the people that love him.  And I want him to feel loved. 



And this little girl is growing up so fast.  But her love language was easy to spot.  She gave me a hug when she was just a tiny baby.  This hug even brought tears to my husband's eyes when he realized what was going on.  She likes to curl up next to me on the couch and I put my arm around her as she reads.  She is reading Anne of Green Gables right now and we are going to have a girl's movie day when she is done with the book and before she reads the rest. She is so happy that it's 18 AR points.  She is almost at 100 which is pretty good considering she has a busy schedule and we do a lot of activities together as a family.

Did I mention I realized what my love language really is? For years I thought it was something else. Thinking back I can see how it has really shaped my behavior.  Any guesses? 



1 comment:

Jalane said...

I love this post and love the way you went about your son saying presents made him happy!